10 years on, enough remains the same.

Put this video on. It means so much to me. Read along with it playing. It might make a little more sense then.

I've struggled all week to come to terms with how I feel about Electric Picnic. I have run the full gauntlet of emotion here. Love, hatred, girls, friends, death, life and that ineffable feeling. I will always be back for the pilgrimage. As usual, I am completely incapable of compiling a sensible description of it. Suffice to say, 10 years attending, the magic has changed, the faces around me have changed, and the state in which I see the weekend have changed. The easiest way to sum it up is that I don't ever want there to be a time where I conciously decide to not attend.

Will it? Won't it? Concern in February. Sure it will. CONFIRMED. Loyalty tickets;cheap as chips. Mounting crews. The last minute panic. WHATCHOO MEAN SOLD OUT? #imminent Running around a park. 2 last gasp successes. Panic over. Packing begins. Co-ordinated via SnapChat, plans come together. 1.30am Haircut decisions. 8.15 pick ups. Realising you hate them just a little bit. Secret route success. Arrivals. Wristbands. Safe through the search. Smiles. Cakes. IMMINENT. Set up complete - ish. We await the scoutmaster generals. Now complete. Now firsts, quickly followed seconds. Suncream, rain spitting. The promise of the weekend. The little bit of session that never dies. Relit, familiar smells, same old spots. New, but just enough is the same.

Familiar friends, new friends. Casual acquaintinces, soulmates for those 90ish hours. Here together, ready.....expecting. Names and introductions. Inductions of the imbibed kind. "Canvas" palaces. Bets over directions. Salads win out. Through the gates again, spilling onto the grass, the beat entrancing. Handstand attempts. Wander to old haunts, new seats, different angles. Safe in the knowledge it is just enough the same.

More arrivals. More introductions. Chemical fuzziness. The wear and tear starts. Final arrivals. Our little family is complete. Bounce alive to Norman, remember none of it. Conversations, ears aflame. Memories spat out and memories created. Life changes when you refuse a 2nd snickers. Pick up and fuel up. Dress up, warm up. Romacing in hats. To the ship, to the beats. Kind souls shake us awake, and send us back to "homes". It is just enough the same. 

Morning dew reminds us of the cold. First one always defines the day. Bright, still full  of promise. New friends, morning rituals. Shocked young ones. So much music. So very much music for those so misdirected. Delight in the loudness. Stupid, brilliant signs. Cross out the options. Its not Zep but is close. Icelandic wonder covers Stradbally and not for the first time. Young Wonder snaps it in half. Mentally screaming out for more. New friends, same old stories. One last happy man. Stars stars stars. No, not drugs - they're stars! Two Doors, Disclosure. Stupid but fun. Speak to everybody. Be the dance you want to dance. Mischief in the forests. Fake security of the most unlikely kind. Mentoring a friend through their first. Success. Some ironic GAA sports coverage keeps family awake. Things are still enough the same.

One last squeeze. Sleeping bags ignored. Sleep where we fall. Sedate starts. Comfortable beginings. Prosecco calculations, hummus and cheese came soon. Buffoon-like siblings. Laughter. Ha-stocking. 5 years later, and in 5 years time. Darkness falls too soon. One last purchase. One last push. David Byrne & St Vincent make things freeze, and go and stop and play. THIS MUST BE THE ACTUAL PLACE. Group texts of joy. Successfully managing to avoid twitter and what I would only say. What a great idea, what a place. Snatched sleeps on the cool cool grass. Guarded sleeps at the Monkeys. Taking far too long to understand the lights. Le Galaxie snatch the last of the energy. Elephant mask aplenty. Neon everywhere. Everything must be glow. John Williams blasts through the night. Onto Mother, friends of old, dancing. LCD close out my world as the souls slip away to sleep. Thinsgs stay the same.

Where are my friends tonight? A lot of them were standing there with me. Wipe away the tear, accept my part and lose to the closing sleep.

Real life claims us back. Battery, coverage, debit cards, work. 

Every year it feels like my chest is on fire. Every year I try and keep a tiny spark of that fire lit. 

Knowing glances in the real world with people you know you knew in the forest. Smile at those people. The picnic lasts longer than the wristband.

10 Years on, enough remains the same.